in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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