as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
