Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Randomize
