Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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