I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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