Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize