is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
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