You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Sober January is a disaster.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
