Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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