I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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