He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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