Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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