a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
