so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
