she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
