that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize