I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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