I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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