we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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