help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
