Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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