I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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