whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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