I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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