dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
