My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
