I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize