So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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