you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
