So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I'm going to jail i love you
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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