I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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