Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
