When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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