Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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