I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
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