i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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