tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
