so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Randomize