I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
