He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
