So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
