The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
If I die, sorry about rent.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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