carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I touched a dick in church today
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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