Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
