oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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