All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
