He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize