I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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