I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
