i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
