We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
