Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
