i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
honey bunches of taint.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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